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TIM
The best way to deal with the issues of attraction to younger guys is not to be afraid of these feelings but to confront them. The emotional side of the equation needs to be balanced out by accepting yourself.

I actually worked in law enforcement for 2 years, and saw people who were really predators. The reaction of my work mates to the inmates who were called "sex offenders" was quite dramatic. There are shades of grey in any issue it is not all black and white. I did not trust a lot of them, they were very homophobic and hated gays. If you let on you liked boys oh shit do the math.

I worked in a detention camp and met a young guy. His family came from Afganistan and were escaping the fighting and general chaos. I first met the boy in medical when I was doing a shift, his mother had a nervous breakdown and was taken of to the hospital in town.

His sister and the boy were quite upset by all of this. They were crying and upset. I comforted the boy, hugging him, the camp shrink was there comforting the girl.

Later on I would visit the boy, knowing that I was going to get into the shit for it. One of the bosses wanted to drag me over the coals for it. The kid did not have a father, and I guess I was one of the people in his life that he looked up to. I revisted the center a number of times over the next 18 months to see if he was okay.

I put myself on the line for this kid, I was worried about his well being in that place. My country believes in the mandatory detention of asylum seekers. It is offical policy. It further traumatizes people who have already gone through hell, and I am sorry to say is a policy that they are loathe to reverse.

If you became friendly with a detainee you were regarded with suspicion by the other guards. This did not bother me, I would talk to the detainees, listen to what they had to say ,even made friends with their kids. I only wanted to see the best outcome for them.

I used to fight the feelings I had, now I have accepted them, my boyfriend also loves kids. He is a really cool guy and is getting subtle hints about my prefs. But I think it is wise not to tell him just yet.

Tim, 31
Submitted 15 Nov 2003

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